smile.: January 2016

Fun times to be reminisced,

Returning hopefully, oh how i missed.

Important to one and another,

Enjoying the company of each other.

New experiences along the way,

Doing fun things together all day.

See you again, my friend.

9/12 ; first ever cookie baking experience
- i'm proud to share my first cookie baking experience with carmen. i never thought i'd do it from scratch, especially making and kneading the dough. my favourite part of making cookies is cutting shapes and decorating. and the cookies were for a good cause, sn's birthday.

look at this cute shrek cookie!

19/12 ; senior prom
- i want to thank carmen and my mom for helping hopeless me prepare for prom last minute. carmen for borrowing me her nail polish and my mom for not complaining so much about me being such an ass for procrastinating. i'm really not like other girls. other girls simply look forward to occasions where they can dress all pretty to woo, while there's me who likes to go chill in a coffee shop wearing simple clothes but ofc stylishly.

- i guess it was too late for my make-up skills to catch up but prom arrived. i didn't really get the dress of my dreams nor the guy to go to prom with like in the high school movies. i had my friends with me, someone who came to my rescue and someone who truly likes me for me. the two i specially mentioned are amazing people and i hope they continue to be that way always. i also want to thank km for lending me her make-up and high heels (i literally felt like i could crush the world). and also thank you to sn and lyn for helping me with my make-up last minute. i loved the lip colour on me.
- congratulations to mingyik and zxuan to being 2015's prom king and queen. too cute. i'm proud to say that i love my schoolmates only during raving sessions. brp-ians are truly the rave champion out of all the other schools. we know how to let go and have fun.
- tips on buying prom dresses for girls; buy a dress that'll stay connected to your body bc it'll be helpful during raving sessions. do not wear tube dresses bc they'll fall and you'll be exposed.

- after the night, we hung out at sn and lyn's room to watch behind the scenes of lyn's video. we were basically VIPs and we even got to eat yummy snacks. watch the video here. oh and the part where sn and lyn laughed hysterically during the durian snack was bc i made a really fugly face after smelling it cuz i don't like durian. just wanna get it out there yaa knowww.
- fools, late night talks and lots of choi dai di had us sleeping at 4AM. it was a warm and fuzzy feeling to be sleeping with my friends beside me. ironically, we didn't do no boy chat nor braiding hairstyles thing like girls are supposed to do in a sleepover.

- the part where i realise everything could never be the same.
woke up, getting ready to get breakfast while suddenly kxian for some unknown reason came to our room (don't know how he knew) asked us if we had an extra toothbrush? and then later visited by sylvester asking if we'd like to eat breakfast with them. it was a good chance to catch up so why not?
- i wonder if the boys gave us the right room number bc no one freaking answered the door, so we knocked and sweared (cuz that's what friends do all right) behind the door to see that it was some dude half naked wrapped with a robe half-asleep to meet us at the door. embarrassing as it sounds, i guess the guy just ain't gonna have his day that day. hahaha.
- "what an honour to have breakfast with the prom king." - syl. this cracked me up.
- it was nice to catch up but hmm everything just didn't felt quite the same. i don't know if i was the one who changed or was it someone else. nonetheless, the beauty of the christmas tree in pavillion was a good enough distraction for me to not think about that.

the end of our last night.

23/12 ; first outing with the whole squad

- it's actually the first time every one of the members of our squad actually came out together. i regret all the moments when i hang out with the squad and think "lol i'll just dress casual it's not like we're gonna take lots of pictures anyway" since we always forget to. and i wished how wrong was i every time that thought came up bc i'm always wrong. oh wells. looking good is never on my side. new challenge for me: try to look presentable when you out. ikea breakfast, star wars movie, book hunting, birthday surprising ~~(which failed bc sam said mm-hmm)~~ and clothes shopping. accidents of dropping wedding dresses and mannequin's wigs too. and a funny video.

sn's

my crave for flower crowns just increased.

sneak peek of pewds' book:

rekt with our amazing surprise.

squad 2k15

1/1 ; spent the first day of the new year in bukit tinggi.

- are buildings in holland really like this? i'd love to live there if they were. it's so lovely, reminds me of the olden times and princes would walk pass the village. me looking out the window singing while birds land on my finger.

the emo of swans.

japanese tea village.

4/1 ; catching up with km.

our girl's staring college soon so a last meeting and fun baking session with her won't hurt would it? our little coffee chocolate muffins failed tremendously but we got to witness science and have fun in the kitchen. thanks so much for letting me and krn wreck your kitchen mun ^^. all the best in college! get a hot boyfriend and recommend the hot guys to me hahaha. and thanks to your mom for those encouraging words of wisdom she gave us after failing haha.

13/1 ; farewell terminator

- goodbye terminator. you were with me for a year and nine months. sadly we couldn't crack two years hahaha. you were my support (literally) and i guess this is goodbye to the hospital days which i used to dread so much. my first time getting a cast, sitting on a wheelchair and going through surgery. it was a crazy journey. it was horrible to stay at home and thought about how useless i was when i couldn't even get up by myself in the morning. the times where your friends are in school smiling and you're in bed crying. after a few days, you got used to the loneliness and instead of dreading, you found a way to stay happy, and plus a new interest. you changed. and changed again.

- unlike the first surgery, i was very i repeat very calm going through this one. probably because i know that i'm safe under the hands of the professionals. i felt safe and there was nothing to worry about. there weren't that much pain this time instead i was very exhausted and had to deal with the taste of chemical oxygen every time something went down my throat.

the only thing i wished i could experience during this time is the hardship of work. sadly i couldn't get any part-time jobs since my arm can't support. after my clavicle heals, i might go for something that requires less strength since i have a very weak body. maybe retail or books? hope i can get one with my friend as well. more things await in 2016. i hope they'll be nice ones. fingers crossed xx.

// i actually got terminator back hehehehe. i know it somehow gives me this weird gross feeling but it's a souvenir for what i've been through all right.

// i burnt my hand baking chinese new year snacks. i really can't do restaurant work or else i might break all their glassware and furniture.

// i really do feel old. it's the stage where you're at 40% kid and 60% adult.

dear silent night,
as silent as you think you might,
out of everyone, you shine bright.
you have a beautiful, exquisite mind,
that you don't really show but hide.
your voice is a melody not matter what you do,
laugh, sing, talk and even trying to be cool.
you are all things different inside and out,
the clothes, the music. it's the thought that counts.
thank you for being with me throughout all the years,
it was a sad but blissful time we had oh so dear.

dear shining light,
your light was naturally born with you as you grow,
blessed with people who follow its glow.
maybe god has helped you on your way,
to become the person you are today.
destiny has lead you to many good things,
friendship, romance and others to be.
there are some things that i wished you known,
but i guess that's for you to discover by your own.
you offer so for others to be glee,
but always remember to not neglect thee.

dear carousel,
it's a love/hate relationship, you and me,
confusing as though nothing is complicated it seems.
you were the lighter who gave me my fire,
to change me into a whole new person that i desire.
you taught me things that i didn't knew,
and i taught you things you turned out to do.
we are so similar yet so different,
every adventure we've been through had its essence.
we're like yin and yang balancing each other,
but that's what makes us stick together.

dear the celestial,
i thought i knew the definition of weird,
but i guess i didn't when i met you these years.
you question about the natures of this world,
and go beyond deep about the other things that weren't.
sometimes you were psychic, you could read what's on my mind,
just like an open book or maybe i was too kind?
your generosity goes a long way,
for those who you care, you'd always stay.
thank you for always being my pain reliever,
letting out my thoughts as open as freedom.

dear crescent moon,
you were that person that always had direction,
your confidence, your style, you had passion for your desire.
you were always protected by the people around you,
but once they all left, you stood high and profound to.
the change gave you a misunderstanding that even you didn't knew,
luckily you're blessed with the few people who stayed for you.
you were the girl that everyone adorned for,
even i admit that i wanted to stay with you more.
now you're capable of anything you want to do,
and i'm glad that you changed you for you.

dear small worth,
remember the tree that you were coming to?
you actually came and i'm so grateful.
your compliment on my writing gave me an infinite boost,
to affirm the truth that it's something i want to pursue.
even when i was down and left alone by myself,
somehow you, were there for me no matter how.
i would give the whole world to thank such a beautiful being like you,
but i really don't know anything and how to.
we don't need words to communicate through,
we just knew instantly. we just knew.

dear zenography and fathom,
you were both enigmas that i couldn't solve,
the fame, the love, you guys had it all.
but deep inside you, you all had your holes.
by acting all whimsical you managed to hid your faults.
i still remember the moment that highlights my life,
when i didn't knew you guys well, you did it by surprise.
when you told me 'we tricked you to know what you like',
i couldn't be anymore thankful to take that one bite.
we distanced ourselves but the memories are still there,
i promise i'll do something bigger because i still care.

dear you,
we had small talks but they weren't just that,
we felt it, it was more, it was crazy if you'd ask.
it's amazing how we connect, so similar you and me,
but we're always blocked by a wall of uncertainty.
we slowly lose contact because we're too alike,
we had the same past, same experiences, same mind.
i hope you're doing well amidst all your troubles,
finally doing what you want without any hustle.
all in all, i would never forget,
that you were the one who gave laughs and stuff to recollect.

// my head totally cracked guys. hahaha.
// i'm not good at writing poems unless i rhyme. please tell me if i did a good job?
// "we all need someone to kiss us goodbye" - marcie. i guess this is my way of sending you off.
// quote inspired by the anime 'your lie in april'. i just finished watching it and it was beautiful. it's an anime about the passion for music and the way it connects you and others. one of the characters properly envisioned my feelings when i had to dealt with my broken shoulder. luckily i'm not violinist so i won't feel so useless when i can't even hold my own bow. it really taught me about the significance of life. added to one of my favourites.

welcome to disneyland. the place where all little girls' and little boys' dreams come true.
ever since before my brother started upsr, my mom has always promised us one important thing: if you get straight A's in your important exams, i'll bring you guys to disneyland. idk if my mom did this to encourage us to score well for the exams or that she knows we can never get straight A's but want us to work hard anyway. either way, it never did work out sadly :(. i'm so jealous of people getting good results. and i think they should always be rewarded for their hard work.

feeling super excited on the start of the day. even their tickets just make you shiver with excitement. oh and warning: disneyland out of all attractions on land is the coldest place bc it's located in a secluded place surrounded with no buildings but a lot of trees. so that explains why it's cold.

first stop; tomorrowland. where the future belongs. the structure of their buildings are impressive and massively huge. i think i would've enjoyed disneyland better if i was a kid bc there were mostly kiddy rides than adult rides. but i'm glad how disneyland made the adult rides really entertaining so everyone could leave without regret. it's been super long since i last sat on a roller coaster. the last roller coaster i sat on was in sunway lagoon which was seven months ago! if i don't have an exhilarating rush or not sit on a roller coaster for a long time, i get that uneasy feelings in my gut so i was terrified. space mountain was like the egyptian roller coaster in universal studios, dark and topsy turvy. i was uneasy until i saw little kids daring to ride this so i calmed down a little. after the ride, they totally lied. warning: this ride contains surprising drops. the drops were small af as if i didn't even felt any lol.

second stop; adventureland. the first show for disneyland was the story of the lion king so ofc we had to stop by. the show was astonishing, brilliant and magnificient. sometimes they spoke cantonese even though they're supposed to speak english so i couldn't understand a few sentences. otherwise, it was a great show. after the show we went and get a snack. we found grilled squid but it wasn't as good as ocean park's ~~so don't buy those.~~ buy ocean park's.

this is so beautiful.

third stop; grizzly gulch. we found geyser in the middle of the place. i thought maybe it's a fake one but my brother did his research and said that in the midst of building disneyland they actually stumbled on these geysers and decided to leave them there. it's pretty anyways. out of all the roller coasters in disneyland (which were a few lol), the best one is runaway mine cars. it's fast, thrilling and you would consider riding it again. you can see others riding on it out in the open and there's a reverse drop which is the best part of the ride. would ride that again yas. we headed back to the main street to get lunch and watch the parade. btw, i'm proud to say that the first time i picked from the trashcan was at disneyland. i wanted to take back some of the food containers that disneyland used but i got carried away eating the french fries and threw it just like that. no regrets.

ELSA AND ANNA IS REAL GUYS.

pizza mickey for lunch.

mickey may be everyone's favourite,

but not me, i'm hella winnie the pooh.

after the parade, we went to mystic point, toy story land and back to adventureland. there weren't much in mystic point and toy story land as it's kinda only for kiddies. back at adventureland, i met a dude with a cool-ass beard and apparently i wasn't the only one who thought his beard was hella cool bc people were taking pictures with him like he's won the guinness world record for having the coolest beard.

#couplegoals

when you go to disneyland, there is that exact one thing that you can never miss going to otherwise you're not actually in disneyland. fourth stop; it's a small world bla-bla-bla. luckily by the time we get there, the clock struck 4.20 p.m and the gates for the clock tower opened and little people walked out of it. the ride was honestly too much. like there's so many things to see and idk if you can see all of it from top to bottom and left to right. two parts of the ride made me laugh, 1. when you reach the underwater mermaid singing the song literally underwater and 2. the hawaiian girls dancing vigorously. once you get out of the ride, your head is stuck with that song for the whole day.

it was nearing night time, there was another show called "frozen christmas lighting tree ceremony". before 30 minutes of the start of the show, the whole sidewalk was already filled with people. we wanted to get dinner first but all the restaurants are jammed packed and expensive so we couldn't even eat. we might as well find a good place to sit to watch the show whilst my mom and my dad went to buy some pastries for us.

piglet bread <3

the show starts by anna and prince hans singing (sadly kristoff is not there :c). all the kids went crazy when elsa stepped in lol. it's exactky how crazy fans scream when they see their favourite idols. some kids even pushed me and my brothers just to look at elsa (rude af). the christmas tree lit rainbow-coloured. when they reached the climax singing 'for the first time in forever', snow started falling from the sky. this is the start where i felt the magic of disney, making my childhood dreams come true. disneyland is absolutely more magical at night.

few hours later after the 'frozen christmas lighting ceremony', the night parade was going to start at the main street. but this time we were prepared and we got front row seats on the sidewalk. we didn't bother about dinner since we weren't hungry. the castle was also lit rainbow-coloured with the crescent moon by its side. it's a picture you only see at the start of every disney movie. the parade started with blasting the song 'when can i see you again' of wreck-it ralph sang by owl city (i know my disney all right haha). the start was crazy when we see tinkerbell strapped on a machine flying all about. the part when the truck from 'cars' entered with lights flashing in beat with the music, i could picture myself as a little girl being a deer in the headlights. my eyes were sparkling as if sprinkled with fairy dust and i couldn't even contain my smile bc it was so amazing to see all this in real life. coming to disneyland makes me the happiest person alive. i bet if people are feeling sad, they'd come to disneyland. because i don't think anyone can be sad in disneyland.

wtf is this.

the magic's not over yet bc there's still the fireworks show. and the fireworks at disneyland are unbeatable to the the ones in new year's. the fireworks show also signals as the closing of disneyland which is so smart and well done of them to end the adventure of tourists with a big boom. went and stopped by the souvenir shops to ofc buy some things to remember of the adventure. i bought the mickey ears bc it's a must to buy those when you're at disneyland.

mom said if i were younger, she would've bought this for me.

the fireworks are beyond amazing. it's better to be further away from the venue so you can get a bigger shot of the fireworks. once again after it ended, snow came falling down and everyone left with a big smile on their faces. btw i forgot to mention amidst all this magic, the snow smelled like gasoline. i think else forgot to take a bath lol.

goodbye disneyland.

disneyland, where the magic happens. my magical adventure ends here. it's sad but a blissful time i will remember in my whole entire life. i really wanna thank my mom and dad for giving us the opportunity to visit disneyland while me and my brothers are still young while this is their first time coming as adults. and i'm so glad we choose good timing to come on a weekday bc the lines weren't long. i can't imagine the amount of people on the weekends. and i want to thank the sky for not raining on that day so i could spend the whole day with happy rays of sunshine. in the end, i turned my head back to look at the castle and the repeating sentence of the music played at the parade appeared in my head for the last time:

"But before i go and hit the road, i gotta know till then, when can we do this again?"

a picture i took of the moon.

// literally wanted to tear up thinking back to the experience. i really want to do this again.

// i actually turned on the song to retrieve back all the good vibes i got from disneyland to 2016.
// i was blogging all this with my dog, moomoo on my lap. it's really no difference with having a cat on your lap. as long as you love it, it makes your heart feel warm and fuzzy.

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